Cubs Phenom David Garner: “Watch out for me in ’18”

 

Chicago Cubs’ top pitching prospect, DAVID GARNER, brought down the house last night with his impromptu air guitar performance after pitching a flawless 1.2 innings in Iowa.

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MOM JEANS JEANNIE TAKES US NATIONALS!

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And it’s settled. 2017’s greatest air guitarist in the Unites States of America is MOM JEANS JEANNIE (Nicole Sevcik)!

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USAG DC: Leaks Taken, Leaks Tweeted

While gearing up for tonight’s National Finals in Washington, DC, we were tweeted at by Edward Snowden, who recently learned that his lawyer is also one of our celebrity-patriot-judges this evening at the Black Cat.

 

 

 

We now have our best and brightest working on a high-tech uplink via limited edition gif to get an encrypted feed from Mr. Snowden’s secret location to a show near you.

 

 

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Dark Horse Champs Hoosier Daddy, Shreddy Boop, Op Rock, BroZone Layer, & Kit Kat Advance to Finals!

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Packed house, loaded stream, flawless defense, and a whole lot of heart went into Thursday night’s Dark Horse Competition. HOOSIER DADDY (Luke Sevcik) took the top prize and will fill the five-hole on the National Stage this Saturday. Following him in descending order of good fortune will be SHREDDY BOOP (Athena Kopsidas), OPERATION ROCK-A-PUSSY (Michael P. Lovely), BROZONE LAYER (Mike Katz), and KIT KAT (Kate Rose).

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600+ tune-in to tonight’s Periscope livestream

There’s heart explosions, tons of newcomers, and even some bona fide trolls in tonight’s livestream. But mostly just good folk who know a good performance when they see one. Come here now!

 

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