MOM JEANS JEANNIE TAKES US NATIONALS!

JEANS
 

And it’s settled. 2017’s greatest air guitarist in the Unites States of America is MOM JEANS JEANNIE (Nicole Sevcik)!

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USAG DC: Leaks Taken, Leaks Tweeted

While gearing up for tonight’s National Finals in Washington, DC, we were tweeted at by Edward Snowden, who recently learned that his lawyer is also one of our celebrity-patriot-judges this evening at the Black Cat.

 

 

 

We now have our best and brightest working on a high-tech uplink via limited edition gif to get an encrypted feed from Mr. Snowden’s secret location to a show near you.

 

 

SnowdenRobotGif

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Dark Horse Champs Hoosier Daddy, Shreddy Boop, Op Rock, BroZone Layer, & Kit Kat Advance to Finals!

hoosier-rfw
 

Packed house, loaded stream, flawless defense, and a whole lot of heart went into Thursday night’s Dark Horse Competition. HOOSIER DADDY (Luke Sevcik) took the top prize and will fill the five-hole on the National Stage this Saturday. Following him in descending order of good fortune will be SHREDDY BOOP (Athena Kopsidas), OPERATION ROCK-A-PUSSY (Michael P. Lovely), BROZONE LAYER (Mike Katz), and KIT KAT (Kate Rose).

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600+ tune-in to tonight’s Periscope livestream

There’s heart explosions, tons of newcomers, and even some bona fide trolls in tonight’s livestream. But mostly just good folk who know a good performance when they see one. Come here now!

 

porkHeart-rfw

 

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2017: Champions Descend Upon Washington, DC

Photo Nicole Sevcik
 
The summer 2017 tour has been crayer than cray. Two dozen Qualifier shows — including festival stages, dive bars, and a first ever mid-set speed competition — fed into a half dozen Semifinal concerts in nearly every corner of the country (once again, Alaska and Hawaii get dicked over).

 

And it all culminates in the National Finals this Saturday night in DC.

 

Pundits universally agree that this year we packed more WTF into the 2017 season than ever before (think about it!). There was that thing with the robot head and the time TOMMY FRETLESS (Adam Lee) went park cor up the balcony then tumble-rumbled back down, somehow without injury. And that time when WILLIAM OCEAN, failing to hold onto the handrail as he slowly exited the green room, broke his ankle in ten different places before even setting foot onstage. Our sympathies are with Mr. Ocean and his family, but with past seasons of severed toes and major air-related surgeries, that our only significant injury occurred off-stage is hopefully a step in the right direction.

 
Blaze

 

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