MOM JEANS TAKES PHILLY SEMIFINAL!

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In an unprecedented showing of absolute airness, and following a round three airoff for the record books, MOM JEANS JEANIE (Nicole Sevcik) took the Philly Semifinal with aplomb. Remarked celebrity judge and legendary drummer from The Dead Mikmen, Dean Clean, “it’s superb!”

 

SHRED (Lance Kasten) and newly reactivated-slash remarkably uninjured TOMMY FRETLESS (Adam Lee) will are also headed to DC in hopes of taking the U.S. crown.

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